Statement or Question

In many areas of my life I have struggled, what I know now is a result of not asking questions, but beginning to make statements. All my life I have wanted people to show me the way to, through or around something. There comes a time in spiritual growth when making a statement has to take priority to the question. The statement precedes the question. With a statement you will begin to find answers. Someone answering my question are still their answers, answers for them and only advise for me. My tendency is to look for the easier solution, if you have already gone through it then...you can save time and  pain for me. You may in fact have a significant impact in my journey, though you are not responsible for my spiritual growth.


Have you ever made the statement, "my prayer time is lacking," or " I just do not have any quiet time." They sound like statements, however their intention is a question, can you tell me what I am missing? Or that somehow your relationship with God is allusive. When in fact a statement will prioritize the questions by accepting responsibility. Maturing in faith requires us to stop living as we are entitled, start receiving by engaging. Make the statement "my prayer time is lacking," stop looking and start doing something about it. Asking question limits your liability and responsibility, it is your relationship. You are the one who stands to receive the rewards of your effort.

Stop searching for the answer when you have the solution. When you take responsibility you can invest in the solution. Looking around can help but ultimately looking up will provide hope. Stop asking a question when a statement should be made revealing truth that only comes from accepting responsibility.

Constitutionally incapable...

Today is a new day, a great opportunity to see where He has brought me. Reflecting upon my past I see clearly where I have been. I was awakened with words from "How it Works" from the Big Book of AA. It is the words that deeply resonate inside on me. Read the first few paragraphs, simple brilliance, descriptive of my life in Christ, not just in struggles defeating the demons of alcoholism. For those of you balking, substitute the word "sin."

I was consitutionally incapable of being honest with myself. I want to be blame others, parents, situations or many yea but's keeping me back from progress. That only left me in greater bondage of my past, paralyzing the present. The fact was I am not constitutionally incapable of being honest, I wanted to be. It was easier to wear concealer, avoiding who I really was, the pain that is real. I was empty, void and alone no one will understand. What happens when faced with a choice to be honest, I lacked confidence, the bondage of shame and fear prevented it. I asked myself questions like "what will they think of me?" Someone understands this thinking, it is not right, but they were my thoughts.

I will go as far as to say, my shame and unworthiness may never have changed if it had not been for people showing grace, over and over. There is no substitute for the Throne of Grace, however often you need someone to lead and tell you "He believes in you and so do I."
 I look at life now and know those struggles, I had never been equipped with confidence to be honest. Many people will never understand not being able to be honest, but there is someone who I can offer hope. If you ever encounter someone like me, be patient allow God's grace to fill that heart, you've got your own baggage! It may very well be the grace you give another person that is the turning point to their transformation. It will not be easy, but is it worth it! As I have heard it said, "speak life," we are all broken and defeated in need of a Savior. "There is no easier and softer way."

what's your name....?

Have you ever met someone and forgotten their name only to pass them pretending that you remember? You will never have a relationship based on the pretense of knowing them. It is so much easier to simply say, I have forgotten your name. I rely on myself to remember and even resist asking others to help me remember. Eventually time goes by and  it is even harder to humble yourself before them to admit the simple truth, "I have forgotten your name!" I will never know what I am missing or even know what could have been if I do not ask your name. This is what it takes to value someone even more, admitting our weakness & shortcomings.
I was introduced to Him, even had an encounter with him. I was just too busy with other things to have heard his name. I kept passing him in the halls, on the job and in church. Many spoke of him, even I told stories of him. It's what everyone else was doing. They were not my memories of him. I began to speak less of him, even forgetting about him. Perhaps, he could have helped me the most, but I did not actually know him.
I was feeling alone, afraid and empty. It's like when you buy a car, suddenly you see them everywhere. Everywhere I was, He was looking back to me. The pressures of life were collapsing in on me, but I stopped looking up since I was ashamed of what I had become.  Then one day, I realized who He was and that He had always been there waiting for me. He was not concerned for what I had done. He already knew me! Ever since that moment, I have never forgotten His name!

Do you know His name? If you don't, just ask Him. He'll be glad to tell you, He longs to tell you.

example of Faith....

I am humbled to be another life that is in a significant way touched by Matt Chandler. I have never met Matt, because of his obedience to serve the Lord I am another life impacted. I have listened to the podcast messages of Village Church. Inspiring to me with confidence as he had no formal education when he stepped into the pulpit. His messages are powerful & truth filled because the Father using him to minister. A testimony of transformation when we submit ourselves to Him. Thank you for the very generosity that you have sown into my life.

This story and testimony on this video are powerful. My life transformed because of people like Matt who stand up to preach, teach and live the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Part of living the Gospel is sharing the Gospel with others, by this, I was given hope that this love was available to me. Thank you Village Church and Matt Chandler for again challenging me with the uncertainty & truth of living for Him. There are no gaurantees as to what the path looks like as we follow Him, that should not change the way we honor and serve Him. I look forward to personally thanking you as your faith is richly blessing me.

Now watch this.... http://tinyurl.com/yhznngw thank you for allowing us to be a part of this miracle. It is an honor to lift your family in prayer.

let's get together....

Last night on The Office, Michael made an incredibly profound statement to my spirit, I laughed so hard yet realized the truth it really spoke. "I have made 1,000's of empty promises and none have ever been as generous as this!" still makes me laugh.....

Seems I have a few friends in my life who continue to request time. I have made repeated attempts to actually schedule time, call when I find myself with time or simply reach out and make time! I am beginning to believe it is just not their time! I know this feeling of procrastination.

Let's call a spade a spade, in these particular requests, you want to change but clearly are just not ready for change. Change will require you to move, take action and deny your selfish desires. I am honored that someone would desire to spend time with me, because ultimately I believe they see life change in me. This is what attracts their attention, I am humbled that I stand out because I stand up for Christ. I will always make myself available as time allows, know I am not simply standing by waiting for it to be your time. His time is far too valuable, I realize this now, because I am living for Him.

Bottom line I kept making those empty promises, reaching out does not make the change. Stepping up, making the connection, reaching to Him, actually doing something for Him will lead you to the change you seek. Whether you find yourself at the computer struggling, feeling alone and that God does not answer prayers, that you find no relief to the shame you feel, you're not alone as long as you take that action to move to Him. Continuing to do the same things over and over, expecting different results...is the insanity cycle.


In my life it used to be difficult to embrace change. I continue to remain faithful to Him; now it is welcomed. You see I once saw something in others too that I wished I had, requesting their time. So know that I know how you feel, and if only you would let go of what you see in others and begin to seek it in yourself you too will find yourself being used by Him in time.

Fill your promise with commitment to change, follow through and you will find expty promises are a thing of the past!

Learning from the crowd...

John Bishop's blog title was "leading from the middle of the pack." I have been intriqued by that thought since I first saw the words. I was a follower never knowing how to lead. Today, I believe those words to be true in my life.

I have needed to be a part of "the crowd." Always it was the wrong one, because it was the wrong reasons. Not equiped as a child, my parents struggled to find their own purpose. I never seemed to find affirmation, so my best shot was a group of people. Surrendering anything I had in constant pursuit of fitting in, ending empty and hollow just as I had started. Loosing more of what I once knew and believed. I wanted to do whatever it took to be noticed, recognized, appreciated....to fill a frightening void. To mask the pain of being Fatherless. Ultimately the crowd was a buffer & distraction to the pain inside.

It will never matter what crowd it is, if I'm seeking self worth outside of a personal relationship with Christ. Even as a new believer I did not know how it worked. So I sought a group. I served, studied, joined, participated and gave only to remain empty and void. I could never completely give myself to living right, because I did not know how to reach out. I was following the crowd, not even knowing the purpose of the crowd. I did not know the theology of my beliefs, I was seeking others to build and do for me what I could not do for myself.

Then I was profoundly impacted by Luke 8:40-48. Here's another crowd following Jesus, many of them too may have been following for unknown reasons, just to be a part. What I see in this story was the fact that this woman would stop at nothing to be healed, she had tried everything with the same results. It was not enough to simply "rub against Christ or just catching a glimpse,"  as part of the crowd. She "engaged" by reaching out, touching the Son of God. When He acknowledged that power passed from Him asking "who..." the crowd probably stepped back from Him & she could not hide. By her reaching out she ended up with a personal relationship with Christ.

Bottom line where ever you find yourself engage personally with the Savior. When everything fails you, when you are alone and empty, reach out, the King of Glory is merciful and mighty. Then it does not matter if you're in a crowd, any crowd or all alone...your strength comes from above, the power will flow from Him. And now it has come to pass...I can lead others from the middle of the pack, so they know to reach for Him.

Ugly jars....

Too much for Twitter!

It has been a long time since my last post, so here's just a thought!

If I have learned anything from Pastor Steven & LB;  it is to leverage every opportunity to share the message of the Gospel. This week will be filled to live in contentment with what He has provided and not complain about anything. It will be a perfect opportunity to gain perspective.

Don't be a thermometer as it can only register the temperature. Be the thermostat in your environments this week, a thermostat regulates the temperature effecting everything around it.

In Philippians 2:25-30 Paul speaks of Epaphroditus who's life was balanced in both fellowship and furtherance of the Gospel. It is important that we remain balanced in our daily lives. Like Nehemiah was rebuilding the walls with a sword in one hand and a trowel in the other. It takes both to build the Kingdom. As you bring the peace that transcends understanding into your lives it will disclose itself in your personality & relationships. We will do more to impact others, building the walls for our Lord and furthering the Kingdom for His glory. Live what you speak and speak what you live! The Lord has called us to see joy in all our circumstances, that starts with our perspective. Our perspective is reflected in our actions, our actions are what witnesses to others. Be the joy that others see, reflect His glory and beauty.

Be more than others expect, start today,  thanks for the most recent challenge Pastor. Should be an interesting week with the "Ugly Jar's" and may Jackson Park be blessed in our shortcomings!

this man's vacation exercise...

Ok, truth be told I have this habit of going on vacation to catch up on the exercise I have put off all year. I put long hours in the saddle! Strapped up the cycling shoes, filled the water bottle, earbuds in. I have it in my mind I am off on another adventure, slipping through the mean streets here on the island. Poised to pass upcoming motor vehicles, like a tornado, I am focused, driven with a vision. Hop on my steed, push play, crank up the volume... watch out
Ozzy Osbourne "Crazy Train,"
Crazy, but that’s how it goes
Millions of people living as foes
Maybe it’s not to late
To learn how to love
And forget how to hate.....

Yes, focus, now even inspiration, "learn how to love....," I am off. Watch out golf carts, I'm on yo 'ash, the blaze that just rode past you, is me. Cop-per's catch me if you can, lightening I am. Harmonious sounds of gears, chain and testosterone! Man and machine in unison, well oiled...

Gasp, wheeze, hack.... ouch, it burns, aaahh, I think I am gonna throw up.
"due to a man's stupidity, arrogance and pride that tell him he is capable of doing today what he could do yesterday." quoted by chris pollard 4/8/08. Yes, why is it I get on vacation every year - peddle, skate and run as though I'd been doing it all year long. Only to remember I could not do it then either! What a numbskull, think I just blacked out from a lack of oxygen, did that happen last year too?!!!! Perhaps I will stick to riding with the girls!

At least I was not wearing the Lycra wind suit!!!!!!!!!
It's great getting old, people expect the mind to go, I can finally deliver, it is!
Yes, appearing soon at a mall near you, ready to rock those socks!

hope rests in Him....

Dearest Friend's,


Thank you for all the prayers you have lifted in response to our needs for my mother. They are showing great harvest, as yesterday I was overwhelmed and burdened by the barriers of my capabilities. You have shown how spiritually He provides answer to prayer, even more, shown how community in Christ reflects that love. Tears well in my eyes just typing this to you, humbled, changed and loved by you and our Savior. When I walked into my mother's Sunday after church, my breathe was taken by the mountain. Your prayers have put in perspective the truth Pastor shared 3 weeks ago, "stop telling God about your mountains and start telling your mountains about your God." An absolute truth as I witnessed overwhelming pressure yesterday and after seeking His presence; my heart was transformed and filled with JOY.

No less than amazed by His power and glory through you....

blessed by you,
changed by Him,
living in His peace,
Chris

Rebuilding brick by brick....

In the Book of Nehemiah, Nehemiah felt lead to rebuild the walls surrounding the city of Jerusalem. He had a great job the "cup bearer" to the King. He had access to the king and was provided the good life, there was no earthly reason for Nehemiah to rebuild the city walls hundreds of miles away. To move from the the palace of the king to a city in ruins, yet Nehemiah knew what was on His heart and said "Here I am Lord - send me."

I pray that I may have that faith, that the comforts of today will not hinder or distract the potential for the future He has for me. I rejoice for brick by brick the Savior has changed me, the walls are being rebuilt strengthened from the enemy. More than fortified, I feel hope. It is a feeling that for many years escaped me because of  bondage, behaviors and self serving desires. The brick I thought I would not place, I placed it anyway. It becomes easier to place the other bricks.

God called Biblical heroes on ordinary days. Moses was out tending the sheep when he heard God's call and became a Prophet. David was called home while with his flock and anointed king. Peter, Andrew, James and John were mending nets after a night of failure, but that was the day that Jesus called them to become fishers of men! I read the expression that "like large doors, great life changing events swing on very small hinges." So by the very acts of what we do in honor and service to Him has everlasting impact. We never know the significance of that handshake, conversation by the pool, joyful heart in the classroom, persevering spirit in the boardroom, steadfast for what you believe and how that commonplace conversation will manifest for His glory.

Allow Him to use you, let Him press His plan into your very being. Trust and persevere as Nehemiah, know that the Lord has plans for you. He loves, cares and protects you. Seek His wisdom, Nehemiah sought prayerfully God's plan, waited on God's timing. Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God."

I am challenged to place more bricks on that wall this week, have faith to challenge others, be more than you believe you are today. Trust what you are doing in honor to Him will harvest great change in our city....

accountability.....

Choice's have to be made as to what we esteem, what is filling our hearts and what we want our lives to reflect. So simply speaking, "the life we live in the flesh will pass away, but the life we live in the Spirit will endure forever." If it is the flesh that leads you, the winds will bring you to unpredictable places (John 3:3-8).

There just comes a point in time when you have to stand for the theology of your beliefs. If I proclaim Him, I have to do whatever it takes to love Him. I am burdened when I hear somene who struggles with righteousness because they are not willing to do what it takes to walk in it. Fighting the stumbling blocks with simple applications of accountability and sometimes hard choices. There is always a way to fight what holds us captive if we simply believe in the Power of what is greater. Stop allowing the enemy to have topography in our lives.

Nehemiah 4 speaks of the enemy trying to live among us by simply walking through the low places in our wall. The efforts of the enemy is to deter us from the "cross." All too often it means we have to work with a spear in one hand and continue the work building the fortress for our hearts, marriages, children and Him.

The burden is lifted in knowing I too was not willing to do what it takes....until I started applying the simple steps it then becomes easier to make the harder decisions.

highest honor....

I would consider it a monumental opportunity and blessing when someone comes to you with a request for prayer. Have always felt that, however it is not until my heart was right that I understand what is attached and the power that is unleashed. Had a friend once tell me as he was going through treatment for cancer, I replied "I will pray for you, it is the least I can do." When he responded, "it is the most you can do for me!" Dang, smacked square in the forehead with that one. It has always stuck with me, and now I believe!

Yesterday a friend came to me for that very need, prayer. As I kneeled before Him with my hands on his back I felt a burning presence as I prayed over him. To commit something to Him in prayer may just be the very highest honor I will ever be bestowed, certainly the greatest power I will ever know! It is not just saying a prayer, it is building the temple, feeling the weight of the timbers to glorify Him.

Then this morning I receive this nugget of truth from Pastor Steven, "EXPECTING God to show up goes beyond HOPING He will. Hope is an aspiration. EXPECTATION makes preparation....R U ready?" My response "Today I am, yesterday I hoped...today I know!" What's different...the preparation, the investment, the change that is my life.

Brother, thanks for allowing me the honor to lift that burden before Him. The battles already won, the victory known and the Glory His. He's paid the price to ransom you and I......

Invest in people...

Recently I heard the statement from someone "I'm changing churches; I'm just not getting fed there." To which I responded by asking, "what are you bringing & how are you serving?"

Hebrews speaks of investing our lives in the Kingdom of Heaven, the unseen. Trust Him with the seen (Matthew 6). The Kingdom of Heaven is made up mostly of one thing, people. You grow spiritually by investing yourself into people, using the gifts, talents and resources God has invested in you. Remembering the parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14-30). God blessed those who invested in faith and took risks with what He had given them. The one who buried his talent in the sand.... not so good. Spiritual stagnation, he went looking for another church because he was not being fed...by others.

"Revelation without application is only inspiration and will not lead to transformation." Pastor Steven

surrounded by greatness....

Just have to brag just a little on God, how He has surrounded me with incredibly instrumental people. From every area and aspect of life. Leaders, co-workers, friends and most of all my bride. Here's what spawns this whole thought. Yesterday, I received a text from a good brother that says this profound concept. "The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you!" Just look at Elijah in the Kerith ravine, the brook dries up, and enter in the widow!

This includes our children, which I have to give a shout out to Jessica. May not be a big deal to you, it is to me! She is now a "certified sitter" having taken the Red Cross Certification for Baby Sitting. Yeah, that's right top of the class, she gets that from her mom! She felt lead to take this course and stepped out of her comforts and allowed God to bless her and stretch her. I am both happy and sad. Jess, I love being your dad and I am so proud of you. This is just the beginning of God using you. Sad, simply because my little girl is growing up, dang God is great!

What's my take away from all this? Besides having an awesome wife! Just few years ago I surrendered to the fact that I do not know how to be a father, He has met me every step of the way. Sometimes I just forget. I may not get it right all the time, but hey I am listening and following Him with application. I'll just keep kneeling and asking Him to lead me.

broken again...

After writing a post "broken" the answer too was right there in the Book of James. James 4:6b "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."

The difference in my life today is that I have been broken in humility, the need of a Savior, Healer and Redeemer. I have surrendered and submitted. I seek that I may be free from all that limits His power in my life. Repentance will allow the roots to grow deep in the living water that is Christ Jesus.

Many times broken out of embarrassment, truly just pride. One allows for change and transformation, the other only leads to stagnation and limitation. When speaking with others, I can only pray they know the power that comes from our weakness...it is there grace enters.

Well there you have it, if I had only understood what I had read many times before. May just be the explanation of reading the word and living the word!

what just happened....?

Seems somewhere in time life transformed from reading to living.
1 Thessalonians 1:4-7

When just then it all seemed to explain itself. Past, present and future. The passage goes on to explain the Paul, Silas and Timothy lived among the Thessalonians so that they may learn. They imitate what they learn, then carry that which they have learned to be modeled by others. Seems that's how life change happens.

As I prepare my heart to counsel with another brother this evening, I have a confidence in those who have shared and lived beside me. Life change starts by investment in others allowing God's love to speak. What's even better my bride is out with his fiance' tonight too. An awesome feeling to know how God answers prayer.

For way too long I was surrounded by believer's that leaned against the cross, it was hard for me to see His glory as the eyes of judgement were cast upon me. Now I am surrounded by those who kneel before the cross with their eye's of imperfection cast upon the cross. Do not just speak the words, live them.

As I rip off the words of Perry Noble, "keep running up the score God!"

a violinist....

While watching a violinist I was floored by his focus, his whole body seemed to be caught in that moment. While watching his facial expressions, I began thinking about the music he was playing. As if he was the only instrument playing, he was consumed; oblivious to the sounds & world around him. He trusted the training, rehearsal and knowledge to be completely in tune. He was confident in his craft, skills of others and calling that his only focus was in the present moment. He was not lost in the moment he was focused on the moment. So as the violinist's bow draws across the strings, all sacrifice to that point emboldens him to know he has what it takes to make the next note.

A question I hear from men struggling is how do you resist temptation? Fight then resist, know where the enemy lives among you. Scripture says when tempted; not if. To fight temptation, I actively participate in the moment, on my toes not on my heels. If I am not resisting temptation I may be entertaining it. Submitting to Him I will find confidence in His strength, I can identify where temptation enters and prevent desire from becoming sin.

1 Corinthians 10:13 ends the passage with ...he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

The gospel as a living ever changing force in my life. I have read the book of James for it's practicality & as my ipod plays podcasts in my ears, I listen to Essential James series over and over. Pastor tagged so many one liners that continue to transform my thoughts. Although the line that kept playing over is from Real Change Campaign, "I would rather change little by little than never having changed at all."

In Essential James, Pastor kicked it square. Revelation & application lead to transformation. So in reading James 3:17, I see how He has worked on me. Once living with wrong motives, closed minded, judgement of others, unanswered prayers...living life in utter disregard for the claims of God on my life. When my eyes are opened to the reality of transformation as these things slowly but surely cease to be a part of me. Just then the answer appears, "If we come near to God, He will come near to us and our lives will change." I have peace.......

Way to go God the score seems to be running up!

hope....or Hope?

After speaking to someone who remarked something to the effect of "I hope I will find peace and freedom from what holds me back." When truly the bottom line is "what holds me back....me" As if to say "one day I hope I can go to Disney World." Certainly not if you do not labor for it!

When I suddenly realized hope has become some misrepresentation of it's meaning. In it's own distorted way it means wishful thinking. If there is one thing that I have come to believe is look back in my life, call on history. When I have let go of what holds me back; faith and hope step in to allow His past performance to prove His future faithfulness. In this conversation hope stepped forward and offered the words "Hope is a confidence that God will do as He has promised."

I prefer to live in the hope of His return rather than "I hope Christ returns?" There is no question in that statement for He has responded every time I moved to Him. Steadfast in Hope, I am changed because of that Hope.

"A memory from my past can be just the encouragement I need in a difficult time. When in doubt, think back." (author unknown by me) "The scars of sin will be gone..." Philippians

independence day....

Been thinking about what freedom is; or what it is not because I have more experience in that category.
Freedom is less me and more Thee.
Freedom is not mine but Thine.
Freedom is more Thy than my.
I was in search of independence when what I was really missing was freedom.
As I begin to think about the grace in His pursuing me, I see freedom was paid by those who came before, who gave for the cost of freedom from the law. Christ sacrificed His freedom so that He could pay for mine. He was and is the only way to find freedom. Bought and paid...through that comes real independence, knowing the Father's love for me. An intimacy with God.

That's freedom to me
Mark 10:45 45 "For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many."

responding....

When you hear that voice inside what do you do? I am beginning to hear things more clearly and it is not the food talking!

Today, I heard this "I have brought people to you, now you need to bring people to me." See the witnessing thing has never been my strong suit. Just let my actions speak. For me it is the easy way, never having to step from my comfort. I know that He has plans for my life, comfort is not what's important. I have a bold confidence, not there before. I have the ability to meet people through compassionate understanding, I have been there & I have been forgiven.

Just the other day I was sitting at God's Nectar House (Starbucks) with a new friend, had to thank God, because as I listened to him, it was clear He is using me. I was where he was just a few years ago. Our prayer has always been that He uses our testimony to serve His Kingdom...He is!

To this point it has only required being willing. He is now requiring more from me. I see how God is using my mistakes for His glory. The things that once separated me from Him are now what draw me closer......

I responded, at the very moment He spoke; the person He needed me to speak to was directly in sight. Can not just let my actions speak, I have to voice my actions. He loves me that much...to surround me with people who need to know!

what counts....

Perspective of judgements....
Galatians 6:15 "....what counts is a new creation."
Shame and guilt have kept my life devoid of His power, freedom and grace.
I could never seem to seperate myself from judgement I placed on myself. I must step out of His way, He has shown me value in the new creation I have become. The Victory is won, He doesn't throw our sin back in our face, that's been ransomed, paid and forgiven. "There is no ressurection without a crucifixion." Let go of my understanding and allow His power in the provisions. I appreciate Perry's practical truth in the week2 message from "God is....."series.

So what counts is a new creation, I must remember actively that I am a new creation. Stop bearing the burdens He has already lifted. Stop holding on to what does not belong to me. Start living for today, start believing God is......

Change...

"The place between hope and change....is pain." Real Change Campaign (week4) The difference today I used to believe a message was all it took, "why does it not root?" Then I hear something that describes the very difference in my life today. I used to think God's transformational power could come from a message...because I just wanted to be fed and changed.

A sermon can offer hope
Hope fosters a decision
Decision ministers change
Change demands that I do something more than just listen.....

Stop waiting for the answer, start moving towards it.

expectations....

Sandra and I have had conversations about expectations, that others place, that we place on any given situation. I was struck by the profound revelation, "having no expectations is even an expectation." Communication is what will bring the greatest opportunity to grace. Sometimes you have to speak to the unspoken.

An example, last night someone told me he would be in early to make up 4 hrs. missed. So at when I arrived to find he was not here, my expectations went unmet. At 7:45 (15 min. early)when he arrived "early" I thought it really would have helped if I had asked "what does early mean?"

Sandra had a conversation with someone about how we didn't meeting her expectations, when they were never spoken; only expected. Fact is we never will live up to the expectations of some, if you answer one there will always be another. I lived my childhood insecure by unmet expectations placed on me. Most of which were never spoken, imprisoned by others self imposed out of fear, insecurity a lack of self esteem.

It is easier and I am better at not speaking what needs to be spoken. It is the same thing spiritually for me, when I articulate to God what I carry, it is the only way I allow Him to take it from me. Often it is what's unsaid that can hurt the deepest, so why not just say it, He is just waiting to exceed my expectations; if I ask. That's Grace!

In me, not on me.....

Visiting Starbucks this morning someone mentioned her daughter that suffers from an eating disorder. I asked more, since she was speaking about it. She said "she is anorexic." Immediately my heart felt burdened, pained for this girl. Immediately my response was "I will pray for her," as 1 Thessalonians 5:17 came to mind "pray without ceasing."

What burdens my heart most is that Satan uses the power of our affliction and sin to bind us in the bondage. The bondage of shame and guilt that holds us back from the Resurrection power of Jesus Christ. We are blinded to receiving the grace He paid in the ultimate sacrifice of death on the cross. The fact is we're wrong in our perspective, pray that we may see through His eyes. "See God in me, not the filth that was on me."

Chris Tomlin's "Amazing Grace" he sings "My God my Savior has ransomed me." He has paid the price, even if I feel no worth, He knew the cost He would pay. It was never the cost....it was all the value! My commission as a believer and father is to make sure I do not miss the opportunity to share the value. The cost can keep us captive, the value will set us free....

broken....

Had lunch with a friend today, when I suddenly realized God was speaking to me. We were talking about life, real life "can not always win life." The real deal, smelly stuff you do not want exposed kind of life, because you are way vulnerable life, what will they think of me life. When He dropped this revelation into my lap, there is 2 kinds of "BROKEN."

The first is the kind of broken most people may know...they think they are broken; when in fact they are only embarrassed. There is a big difference, how do you respond to that feeling of broken. You still want to hide it, manipulate it, and shade what people really see, it's prideful. The kind that ultimately keeps people and peace away. The kind that seperates you from the Grace of God.

The other kind of "broken" is the real thing, the kind that can find power through weakness. The kind that feels like you like you've been run over. The kind that praises without saying all the right things. The kind that draws you closer to others, in humility. The kind that can provide the hope needed to remember His faithfulness even when you do not feel it. The kind that seeks prayerfully. The only kind that can provide HOPE even if you are still taking on water.

So as I enjoyed yet another blessing from God, a friend who gets it! I have been both kinds of broken, one is far better than the other. I am grateful He has brought people into my life who understand it's not what you have done, it's what He is doing! Best of all neither one of us noticed it must have smelled! It is Grace to win, not grace to sin....

give to grow...

Matthew 25:14-30 speaks of the parable of the talents, more specifically for me the one who took no risk with while the others took a risk of uncertainty. The others took that faith lead risk, that they may grow in faith. They risked it all so that God would act on their action.

Thanks Holly for making this so clear, in your message, "PURE." I am surrounded by great people. People who seem to be available, willing to allow God to use them as assets in the lives of others. By that very response and action of availability they are avoiding spiritual stagnation. They are the ones growing, the ones I am drawn to. See God will use you, only you stand in the way of that power. Sandra said something last night to me, she has been entrusted with something. Though she may wish to bury it in the earth (she knows what I am talking about) many feet under the soil! She said, "I may not care about this....., but I care about the relationship." What Sandra said was a simple statement with powerful impact on me, essentially you have to risk....you give to grow!

Here's revelation to me; you grow spiritually by investing yourself into people, using the gifts, talents and resources God has invested into you. Avoid spiritual stagnation by allowing Him to use those very gifts, do not hide them in the sand. He will then show you, He can then use you, He then can feel your worship! As Pastor Steven said this past Sunday, worship is equal parts revelation and response.....

ah....yes!

The old familiar predicament of searching for potential employees, balancing a sense of humor and integrity! Here is a direct quote from a resume'! So good I had to post it as life is just simply funny sometimes....

"Self employed, owner of ------.,(til this fine economy of ours went into the crapper)
I'm located in Waxhaw and would be willing to provide references should this actually go anywhere....
....but I'm headed to Charlotte Motor Speedway on Wednesday and will be out of contact til the last race is done..... and the last beer gone!"


See in my industry, here in "NASCAR country," there are only a couple of things that take priority over a serious job hunt! Race weeks & beer, Hunting Season & beer! Comforting to know I have 2 full weeks before I have to make my final decision about his employment with us!

Holy Spirit....

When praying for some friends, over circumstances in their lives that it would be easy to pass judgement, clearly not mine to pass. I would miss the entire lesson of loving others!

Could it be that because of our insensitivity to the working of the Holy Spirit, we often fail to recognize the inner ministry of God in other people's lives?

I came across the story of Hannah & Eli in 1 Samuel, when it became clear for me. Whenever we are tempted to judge another person, I must remember how Eli misunderstood Hannah. Because we cannot fully understand others, we often misinterpret their motives and conduct. Since God alone knows the thoughts and intentions of our hearts, He alone fully understands what motives our behavior.

Simply, I remember Matthew 7:1 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged"

Would it not be better to love others.....than to judge others?

Skipping....perspective

Now just the other day I was holding hands and skipping in a parking lot with one of my daughter's. When someone stopped me, literally stopped me and asked "why are you skipping?" I responded "why wouldn't I?"
1. I was blessed with the opportunity to serve at the non-conference THR3E, all day I was skipping, what a blast to honor and serve God's anointed.
2. That night go to men's group, discuss "The cost of your calling" a message of Pastor Steven's
3. Work is beginning to turn around. Sat in another job meeting when I realized His Provincial timing. Began thinking how will we ever be able to keep up? (been awhile since last had those thoughts!)
4. Heading to a wedding with my best friend, my heart still skips (like a falling chair) when I think about her!
5. My life is surrounded by incredible people
6. My life is blessed with God's Grace
7. My life is filled with restoration, forgiveness, & repentance....I am a new creation in Him!
8. My life is filled with opportunity to PRAISE HIM & Rejoice
9. Did I mention getting away with my bride?
10. Hey Jamie, thanks you've helped my to know how to "choose joy!"

"why wouldn't I skip?"

If you see someone skipping, stop them and ask "why are you skipping!"

significant.....

Had a conversation with a friend recently where he used the words "it is nice to feel important." Now my intentions were not to pick at his words, but I had to interject a thought. I as a man often am focused on "importance" especially as someone who desires to be needed or as my friend LB says "addicted to being a hero." See it is not healthy for me to be important, though it is semantics, important signifies either important or unimportant, relevant or irrelevant, it is judgement based on my limited underdstanding.

Truth is we are all important so we need to see our significance. We are all members of the body. We all bring something, thus we all have value. In that significance I am placing no judgement, rather I understand the value we all bring. That value was the focus Jesus had for me. It had nothing to do with cost He would pay, everything to do with the value of that cost.

Now I would challenge anyone to read Dwight Robertson's book "Plan A, there is no plan b" and step away from that book without being encouraged to understand the value and significance we can all bring to the body of Christ.

what's hiding?

Just the other day I stopped in to buy a sandwich at a deli. People in the seats eating and having their own conversations. People busy working to make orders. Product on the shelves, in the display cases. There was a buzz all over this place, at first glance the scene was so different from what I then noticed. I heard in the back ground the TV programmed to some news network. I could hear the story in the background only to look up to the TV. There across the screen was a big box blocking the program. Inside the box was an announcement from the Satellite provider, "to avoid disruption of service contact customer service regarding outstanding balance." I was profoundly struck by what I realized in that moment.

What hit me is we all have something to hide, we make the outside look all put together. It is the old perception...this is what I want others to see. As if the TV was the eyes of this businesses soul, there it was being disclosed, "All is not as it would appear." Some hide it from others, some try, eventually it becomes exposed. Just another reason I need a Savior in my life, Lord knows as I try to hide it, someone is going to see it. In humility He takes all that from me, He wants it all. The more I seek His grace the more I want to appear put together, it is some less than natural oxymoron...He never hid His wounds for me, He received them for me.

Elevation Church Easter Opener from Elevation Church on Vimeo.
My words will only fall short of the impact this has....turn up the volume, play it over and over. The truth should move those who esteem Him. Here is 2 minutes of truth, hold on.....
Thanks to everyone involved in putting this together for His glory! Jesse, most powerful yet!

Power in weakness.....

In reading through the book of James, many things are written simply that I may understand! Now in the Resurrection season, perspective has been clarified in significant ways. I discover some misconceptions when I think as the world would encourage. Man equates meekness with weakness, humility with inadequacy. God places a high premium on these very attributes that man scorns. The truth is amazingly when we admit our own inadequacy, He shares His total adequacy with us. While the world devalues the man with humility, one who does not thrust himself forward....what if He had not been humble at the cross for me?

Now where do I get this perspective? As Pastor Furtick preached from Isaiah 53:1-6, not your typical Easter message; Pastor drilled home what it is to esteem Christ. What does that look like? What was it like for the pain and suffering as He was pierced for my transgressions and crushed for my iniquities? Pastor asked "Do you hate the sin that put Christ on the cross?" His death was too brutal not to esteem Him, after all He died for me. Now that's perspective, I have got to change......

what level, what risk?

Playing solitaire on the computer I have seen my level of comfort. Instead of risking my "statistics" I prefer to play at a level that allows total comfort, a winning record. I know when my hockey team takes the ice we typically play a better game if we play the first place team, instead of the last place team. We stand the chance of a loss or victory, but we play differently. Are you the underdog or heavily favored for victory?

I am finding I want some predictability in the turbulent seas that is my life right now. I am wanting to play at beginner's level. What is that other than yesterday's success? What am I placing on the line? Am I fighting or folding?

In my journey I am facing giants, the unknown, the odds seem stacked against me. So Biblical reference takes more significance in my walk, what have I been learning? God uses the believer, what that looks like - the weak, the broken, the sinner, the underdog.....
Pastor just shared a message on "4 ways to accelerate escape from no man's land..." His first point was "Take a God lead relational risk." 2 Samuel 12:1-14 Nathan leading David to repentance. Another I think of is Jonathan in 1 Samuel 14, he took a risk from the safety of the pomegranate tree and defeated the Philistines. The odds were not in his favor! I have got to stop feeling sorry for myself, stop waiting on Him. I have to move to Him.....no matter what the outcome I need to step into Him. After all the scripture goes on to say "perhaps the Lord will act on our behalf." If I do not even take the step, how can He act on our behalf? Taking the risk of "act on our behalf" is my part here, have faith, God lead risk, not foolish risk. Taking comfortable risk is no risk at all......

Power to or power through.....

"Is it the power to me or is it the power through me?"
Used to be without a doubt, it's me....to me was the answer.

Here is the profound explanation I received today in reading scripture. The Dead Sea, the largest body of water in a dry thirsty land, is exactly that - a dead sea. The water flows to it, there is no outlet so evaporation and stagnation make it polluted and useless. This is a powerful illustration of faith if I allow it to stagnate. We can know all the right things and even say all the right things, but if our faith finds no expression - no outlet - it is dead. One of the ways true faith will manifest itself is in our attitudes and actions towards others.
(John 7:37-38)
His life giving water must flow through us to touch others...I can not miss the key of that thought. It has nothing to do with the words I speak, everything to do with the Spirit in which it's spoken.

Ouch

Saturday, Sandra and I heard a story that brought me to my knees. We had to pray for this couple, a couple we may never meet, yet our testimony may.... I was so burdened by what I heard, I could not stop at hearing, we had to take action.

A wife's encouraging & coaching....

I must remember that when you feel all alone, let it out in order to let Him in. Some words I received from Sandra this morning....funny how simple words can speak such life into your heart. It can be just the catalyst you need to make the next step, take action and do what needs to be done; calling on His strength.


Some thoughts...
I wanted you to know that I am proud of you. I know this time is very difficult. The Lord is pruning and pressing you. He is making you into that new creation and it does not happen without discomfort. I pray that you will keep your eyes fixed on Him. Know without a shadow of doubt that He has a plan for you. Just take one step forward at a time. Try not to focus on the big picture. We have a lot out there that is overwhelming and scary if we look it all at once. Change does not happen overnight. It takes time and effort. I praise Him that He never gives up on us and walks with us wherever we need to go. I praise Him for you. I am with you heart and soul!

With all my love and respect,
San

Your words, how timely and divinely God has used them to speak to me.

A new creation...

Lord, "You've spoken life into my darkness, now may it serve you!"

New Creation Video Content from Pace Hartfield on Vimeo.

set adrift....

A friend said to me this morning describing my belief in Him and practice there of....."you set sail without the sail being raised, the difference today is your sail has been raised, your bearings are set to the horizon and their is an objective, a destination."
Why does it sound so easy to understand? I was set adrift in the past, trying to head in the right direction, but being tossed about occasionally making progress to the destination, all too often being pushed ashore in the tide. Now I can be more effective, even as the winds change, I come about and I am still heading to the objective. I am allowing Him to fill my sails and push me towards His destination for me. He will fill the sails, I must remain focused on Him continuing to move towards Him.

thanks.....

You ever feel so blown away by His love? All I can say is He provides, Agape Love is so much bigger than any words I would be able to use to express His Grace and our gratitude. So what do you say when His people respond by blessing others?
Let me just try, "Thanks, I am so humbled by His provisions in our life. So humbled I can not sleep, all I can do is lay awake thanking Him for the people in our life. This has been such an incredible journey filled with opportunity to trust in Him. Where I used to simply give up and take my will back because I was so uncomfortable believing I was worthy of His Grace & Love. Now I kneel before Him, all He asks of me is that I believe He died for me. I have to live like I believe, respond to His call & His love fills our life. A peace of life that surpasses all understanding....His love...I believe."

See when I speak of His love, I believe in the significance and value of what He has done for me. I was only able to see what I used to be, now His righteousness has restored me. Amazing Grace....I was blind but now I see. Here's the perfect description of what is happening in my life, thanks Neicy (or have a tissue for this one) for saying exactly what I was thinking, "that people may see God in me, rather than the filth that was on me." Thanks to Him, out of the water I am a new man!

perspective....

Perspective today hits hard as the shop is almost full again with people....work...and fresh reflection. Today's thought while working in the shop 3 radios stations, 1 ipod all programmed to something different. Used to flip me out, yet I never wanted to be the one to let go of what I wanted to hear. Today, it is a symphony of harmonies to my ears, a punch of gratitude and a dose of reality all at the same time.
Just proves how insignificant the issues and how significant the people. Where else can you hear Fleetwood Mac-Breaking Benjamin-Casting Crowns-Latin beats & Pastor preach about Mephibosheth which is almost harder to say than singing along with the Latin hip-hop! Just a little helpful dose of what's good for me....Praising God!

picture this...

Here is an image that I have not been able to let go of....not even sure where or how it landed. The importance is it did.
"Who do you surround yourself with.....those who lean on the cross, our those who kneel before the cross?"
This has proven to be an absolutely powerful image to understand and contemplate. I think I have begun to realize a significant difference as a believer. I have been both, one is proving to be far more powerful in the supernatural transformation of my life and my service to Him. I pray every time I open my eyes it is the foot of the cross that is the first thing I see.

Spare tire...

About 2 years ago I was driving in my truck, I felt a sudden thud then in my rear view I something bounce across the road. It looked like a wheel, it was my spare tire, the mounting had rotted and suddenly let go. I was thinking this was miraculous, it let go from under my truck, bounced across a major roadway and onto the side of the road. Now it took me a little to realize what had happened, and respond to it. When I did respond I can remember that I even said to myself, "well maybe I do not even need it, after all my truck was 13 years old and I had not needed it before, so will I need it in the future?"
I have been thinking about this recently, there is so much to think about.
1. I was willing to risk my safety and not have a spare.
2. No one was injured as it easily could have caused an accident.
3. It was questionable if it was worth my efforts to go after it.
4. Ignore and pretend it never happened.
What has been circulating in my brain is this, God has always been there waiting on me to see Him. I was treating my relationship with Him like a spare tire. Truth is I was waiting for Him to respond to me. He finally said "what do I need to do to get your attention?" Was it not enough He was bouncing in my rear view mirror trying to get my attention. As He bounced, danced across the road not only grabbing my attention, others as well. I turned around and picked it up, threw into the bed...strapped it in and keep it from getting away. I realized, I thought I did not need it, but have realized just how much I need Him.
I have to stop treating my love for Jesus like a spare tire, call on it only when I need it. He wants so much more for me.....

Believe in the value...

Studying Matthew 26, Jesus in Gethsemane as Pastor has shared a message about these passages. I have had a number of conversations with men recently that have drawn me back to this message "The cost of your calling." What has spoken to me most is the burden that Jesus bore for me. In v.38 Jesus was overwhelmed at the cost, yet He focused on the value of what He was doing......for you and for me.

In v.41 Jesus goes on to say "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."
Be on guard. It's one thing to understand with my brain, until I bear that burden and understanding in my heart I believe it is impossible to see the call. I am sickened to know that I was to keep watch, over my own heart and I fall asleep. I love this sickening feeling "I now have this in my heart." I am believing more than ever in the value of His calling on me. I still must be on guard for the stakes continue to grow. The pressing continues with even more pressure, to extract every drop of oil from the olive.
All that I/we have gone through will serve His "calling." You do not get to turn your calling off. The value is too significant. He went to the Cross for me....He knew the cost and died for me.