the fascade....

I received a voicemail last night from an employee, "I may not make it in tomorrow, my mom died, I'll call you in the morning." This floored me, as it was such an a matter of fact statement void of any emotion, monotone and stoic.
Immediately, I am drawn to my own relationships and the inevitable future. I do not know if you would categorize my relationship with my father as estranged, but I would. Virtually have no contact with him, our youngest daughter has never met him and I can not remember the last time I spoke to him.
I stumble through my responsibility in this often, haunted by the possibility of being hurt again. I am 44 years old and still suffer from the lack of a father figure, really his approval. I have always felt as I have not met or lived up to expectations. Amazing to me all I have been blessed with how much I have grown, yet in some way, shape and form I am effected by this relationship.
I ask myself if this "void of emotion" response would be mine if I was leaving this message for someone else. If the answer is yes, what do I need to change in light of what I have learned walking with Him?
When I spoke with this employee this morning he was clearly broken and distraught. Weeping, he told me what was going on and what happened. By no means am I exploiting this conversation, it however reminds me life is short. Bottom line this relationship is disabled because of the lack of communication, not communicating can destroy any relationship. Especially my relationship with the Lord, if I am not investing, embracing and participating I could end up with the same relationships in my life as my father.
I think Christ paid much too high a price for me to ignore and accept time just passing by....and He desires more from me than to just let life pass.....